Last Friday was beautiful here in Seattle. As I maneuvered my way through downtown’s traffic enjoying the sunshine and summer-like feel of the day I thought about the interview I was going to. With the exception of a couple bands, I’ve not been a big fan of nu metal/alternative metal and yet, here I was going to meet Brian "Head" Welch, ex -lead guitarist and co-founder of the band Korn.

Korn was huge worldwide selling millions of albums, winning Grammy nominations, as well as taking a couple home and living the "rockstar" life. Yet with all that success so often comes the darker side of the business and Welch found himself falling into the abyss of drugs, alcohol, depression and self-imposed isolation. Luckily for him, unlike others in his position that die too young due to overdoses, Welch found himself at a crossroads. In 2005, he found the Lord Jesus Christ, quit Korn and was able to kick his addictions, setting himself on a new path that would inevitably bring him back to his music and his fans.

Welch is currently touring, promoting not only his solo album, "Save Me From Myself," which debuted at #13 on Billboard’s Top Hard Rock Albums, but also his New York Times Best Selling autobiography, "Save Me From Myself: How I found God, Quit Korn, Kicked Drugs, and Lived to Tell My Story." That’s where I come in. I read the book and was very impressed with this man’s life and his newfound spiritual quest and so that’s what brought me to the Fairmont Olympic Hotel to sit down and chat a bit with Welch in order to satisfy my curiosity and to share with all of you.

Welch’s manager brought me into his room, which was nice, a bit small, but comfortable. He apologized for the clutter and I waived it and said I was just fine and not to worry about me. There was a knock at the door and in walks Welch. After the typical introductions and greetings we settled into a couple of chairs and I asked him how he was doing. The first thing he said was, "I’m cold." Understandable considering he currently lives in Arizona. I told him we were actually enjoying warm weather here for this time of year and that started us off on a friendly footing.

DB: Brian, I’m just going to start by saying that you’ve probably answered the same questions a million times now-- all about Korn, where you’ve been and how you got here.

BW: Yeah.

DB: I’d like to ask you what’s here for today and what do you see for tomorrow?

BW: Like my life you mean?

DB: Yeah, your life, music.

BW: Well, we’re working on the CD promotional tour right now so that’s here today and hopefully playing a live tour playing live shows.

DB: Nice.

BW: Hey, I’m cool with all the Korn days and stuff. It’s where I came from. I wouldn’t be here if I weren’t there.

DB: That’s true. do you have any prospects for a tour at this time? Do you have people pounding on the door?

BW: There’s people calling and offering you know, but I don’t know. We’re just going to tackle it, that’s next on the agenda. I haven’t played with anyone besides Korn, so it’s going to be something I got to just jump into head first, just go for it.

DB: Are you venturing out looking for people?

BW: I’m just letting it fall into place.

DB: Letting the Divine kind of bring it to you, huh?

BW: Everything else is happening divinely so you know. I tried to put out this record like three different times. Doors kept getting shut and I just gave up. Worked on my book then all of a sudden it just opened up, so I’m going to let the band thing just happen too.

DB: How did the book deal come about?

BW: They were looking for a record deal actually and people just weren’t interested at the time. The timing wasn’t right and my manager/friend at the time brought me back a book deal instead of a record deal and I was like, "I don’t want a book deal, I’m a musician." But he was like, "But if you sign this you’re an author/musician." So I was like, "All right, I’ll tell my story." I didn’t really want to do it, I wanted someone else to write it and I got a nice guy. A ghost writer you know. He wrote the first chapter and I just took over from there 'cause he didn’t live it so he couldn’t write it right. And so I started writing and 75,000 words later I was like, "Wow! That wasn’t me, that was God-driven."

DB: But you found you had a lot to say though.

BW: Yeah. Once you get into it, it just pours out.

DB: So what about tomorrow are you just going to let divine intervention take over? Do you have any insight into where you want to go? What you want to do?

BW: YeaH, I want to get on the road and do some stuff live. We’ve got people we’ve been in contact with. I’ve got a friend in Phoenix, he’s a really good guitar player. We’re just going to tackle it when it comes. After this, I’d like to go out and play again.

DB: Do you miss it?

BW: Yeah. It’s hard though to get out on the road, but I’ve never done it with all this goodness in me so it’s going to be great this time, I think. I know it is.

DB: You feel like you’re in a space where you can go out there and know that this is all going to be a new chapter, new way of touring?

BW: Yeah, everything’s new. Everything’s cool. I’m looking forward to just… I can fit in anywhere now and just be at peace. I like people. It’s crazy 'cause it’s the opposite of what I used to be so I’m good to go, as long as my daughter’s taken care of. If I have someone to home school and stuff so I can take her on the road with me. If that doesn’t fall into place, then I’ll do it later on, but I’m sure it will.

DB: Yeah, things have a way of working out. Do you see musicians that are on the same path as you coming into play?

BW: They need to not be raging partiers 'cause that’s not good. I’ve been down that road and it’s not where I’m at right now. But they don’t have to have my beliefs I don’t think 'cause look who played on my album. They weren’t Christians. Just so they know… I’m all about God, but its just music. To some people it will be a message of spirituality and others it’ll just be music, so it depends on the person.

DB: you don’t want that kind of lifestyle around now. I mean, backstage and all.

BW: No I don’t want that around. I just don’t want it, you know?

DB: Have you been around it much?

BW: No. It’s going to be a different lifestyle. People can hang out and stuff, it’s just not going to be gallons of JD and endless beer and craziness going on.

DB: Sounds like a good plan.

BW: Yeah, leave that to the new bands coming out that want to explore.

DB: Those with younger, stronger livers. (laughs)

BW: (laughs) Yeah, exactly.

DB: I listened to your songs on your MySpace page. I like the combination of hard-driven music with a positive message.

BW: Oh cool. It’s like love and war type of music. It’s heavy, but there’s always some euphoric peace somewhere in the song.

DB: Since this has all come about, do you find you can sit and write mellow stuff or is that not in your nature?

BW: YeaH, I mean I think there’s a lot of mellow stuff in these songs. Even if they're heavy, there’s a melody underneath that if you took the heavy guitars out it could be like classical or atmospheric, trippy music. Even on the song called "Rebel" it’s like screaming, screaming and then it drops down to this piano part. Yeah, that opened up to me, the spiritual side opened up to me and, uh, that’s pretty cool. I like that. I’ve always loved melody.

DB: Did you ever think that the music you wrote before kind of derived from pain and anger and things like that?

BW: Back in Korn you mean? Yeah, well maybe not the guitar and music, but the lyrics definitely came from a place of anger and pain and resentment and bitterness. It was just like Jonathan screaming about stuff he went through and that’s basically what I’m doing now, but I always have a song of victory somewhere. Instead of just saying F-you and all that. But it’s similar, you can feel pain in my stuff. You know I’m begging for help being addicted to drugs. There’s a Korn song about that on our first album, so people can relate to it I think.

DB: "Were you surprised then that you still had the drive of the music-- the same progressions, beats, yet this was light instead of dark?

BW: I was actually writing softer music when I gave my life to Christ and I was praying, "What am I doing? Where am I going to go?" and I know he called me. People think I’m crazy sometimes, but I really felt that God led me to do the heavy music. It’s what I am and then all of a sudden these songs started coming out and that’s where I got my album. I believe it was a gift from God through me to people. It’s inspiring.

DB: Maybe because you’re still writing the same kind of music, you will still be able to reach the youth and the fan base that you had with a better message.

BW: Yep. And just… even if it’s not like me trying to give them a message, a lot of people are listening to what I went through as a testimony and it’s like there’s power in someone sharing what they went through, you know?Especially if it’s real and they're not making stuff up just to have a cool song and for everyone to like them. If they’re sharing what’s inside, it’s powerful, it’s spiritual. That’s what spiritual stuff is, it's like letting all the darkness come out to light and sharing it and overcoming all the evil. That’s what we all struggle with, right?

DB: Yes, to some degree.

BW: We’re always fighting, trying to be nice to people when they are rude, so we don’t lash back-- or trying not to eat that extra piece of cake. It’s always something we’re trying to stop ourselves from doing, right?

DB: I have to say that given this was your first venture writing a book that is. I really couldn’t put it down, Brian. I was really touched by your humility and just your spirit.

BW: Thank you.

DB: Just being around musicians and that kind of lifestyle. Well, you made it real clear in the book. You had the records, you had the tour buses, the money, and the fame. You had people around to do for you, what you needed 24/7 and yet you didn’t take it all in. You didn’t fall as far into all of it as the others did.

BW: I don’t know, I felt like a fish out of water all the time. I had everything I wanted and I felt like a fish out of water. That’ll make a person miserable, you know? You have what you want, but you don’t feel right inside. It’s crazy.

DB: Did you know then like, "Wow, this isn’t where it’s at"?

BW: Well, I was there and I thought this is where it should be, but inside something’s saying this is not where it is for you. But I thought, "What do you mean? My whole life is about music. Why do I feel like this inside? Why can’t I just go a day without drinking?" It was crazy. I didn’t understand. Life didn’t make any sense to me and I wasn’t humble before, I was wild. I was being honest in the book. Those were my true feelings inside, but on the outside… (laughs) I was a good guy though, people always said I didn’t act like a rockstar, but I was pretty wild. I think people could see through me. I was trying to be really wild, but I really wasn’t that type of person.

DB: Do you sit now and think, "Wow, I had no idea when I was there that I would be here today. Where I am now?"

BW: Oh yeah. If you would have told me four years ago I would have said, "You're crazy, pass that joint to me you’re smoking too much." But umm it was real. Accepting Christ and finding out about it in the church, I was like "Yeah, right," but when I went home and started talking to God it became real. I was like, "Whoa!" What I was experiencing was spiritual, by myself. I didn’t really hear a lot about that stuff talked in the church, so it was a trip. I need a real thing happening. Something more than dry religion.

DB: Yes, well we all need that. That’s not where it’s at. It’s not spirit is it?

BW: That’ll drive you away. It’s like when it comes to rules and regulations, a country club kind of vibe, no way, that’s not me.

DB: You’re just going to go from here and see where you’re taken and see where you’re needed?

BW: Yeah, I’m just going to try to take care of my kid, that’s number one, well, my whole relationship with God is number one, but they go together and then all this stuff letting God live through me and letting all this happen. It’s crazy 'cause I almost lost everything in the beginning of '08. I had all these businesses and they all fell through at once and I was sitting there thinking, "OK, I’m going to move and do something else." I really didn’t care.

 I just love to be connected with God and I didn’t care, you know I did all that. I said, "If you want stuff to happen, you want to live through me and do stuff, then you’ve got to do it. I’m not going to strive. I’m happy with you" and then, right when I was at my worst spot, doors started opening. I got my record label and then within a few months my album’s out its just crazy. It’s like my life symbolized that cross. You’re like dead on that cross and going OK and then, resurrection! Things just went bam! and popped open and here I am talking to you. It’s pretty cool.

DB: It’s very cool. You use the word "crazy," you seem a bit concerned, I don’t want to put words in your mouth, maybe a little concerned about what your fan base was thinking.

BW: Yeah.

DB: How are you feeling now, are you at a point where you’ve found you don’t mind what someone is thinking?

BW: Well, you’ve got to be able to talk to people 'cause you want to be able to reach people, you don’t want to alienate anyone. I believe what I believe, but I’m also wiser now as far as how I act and talk about things. I just feel it out and I know what I can share like my personal and spiritual life and what I should keep quite about. Sometimes you just got to put a lid on it (laughs). Just connecting, having a relationship instead of saying, "Well the Bible says this" and so on, you don’t do that. You’re a walking testimony of divine love you know.

DB: That’s nice. It’s good.

BW: It’s better than just blurting out what you know, trying to puff up the ego.

DB: (laughs) Well, that’s part of that rockstar stuff.

BW: You can fall into it with this God stuff too.

DB: So you don’t care what the masses think, you’re just going to do your thing and whoever hears, whoever gets something out of it and you’re OK with those who say…

BW: Yeah, I used to be that guy, that would say, "Oh god, this guy's crazy." This guy, when I was on drugs and needed someone to help me, this guy came to me trying to talk about Jesus and I said, "You’re a Bible banger, get away from me you freak." He was an old punk rocker that used to beat up people and he was saying, "The Lord just delivered me" and I was like, "You’re weird, go!" So I know where they’re coming from and when they call me weird I say, "I know, man. Your spiritual eyes just aren’t open. It’s all right." But we’re also human and so it’s like a dart sometimes. A little… (fist to his chest)

DB: Do you have anything else you want to say or share?

BW: Not to just put the album out there, but I communicate best with music, that’s why I want to get the album into people’s hands and ears and hearts and spirits. I just appreciate my fans that didn’t bail out when I went through my crazy stage, when I got a little too nuts after the methamphetamine abuse for two years. They just taught me a lot about faithfulness and loyalty, so I just want to thank them.

***

I’d like to thank Brian for keeping it real. It was a great pleasure to talk with him. He’s a really nice guy and remarkably calm in the wake of such major change. He is truly an inspiration as to what faith is all about. Check out his MySpace page. www.myspace.com/brianheadwelch His official site is www.brianheadwelch.net